Zurich: Otherwise known as ZuRICH

There is a strong probability that Britt will not make it home with a functional camera. Two down, one to go. Given the exceptional cost of everything in Zurich, JD's two euros lost to the vending machine now seems like nothing. His current German grade would be a C +. Alice's Swiss checklist has not been as successful due (again) to exhorbitant costs of everything. She has checked off everything that can be bought at a grocery store. Thankfully, Ashley's underwear cannot be seen on Fraulein Maria's Biking Tour facebook page. But you can still check out her and Alice's brave river jump by clicking on this link: http://www.facebook.com/#!/photo.php?fbid=10151225375850830&set=a.10151225372055830.553615.95601290829&type=3&theater

Zurich was...zee most expensive.

Where we stayed: In a somewhat sketchy hostel above a coffee shop, run by bohemian hipsters. Similar to Prague, we had a lot of space and were centrally located, which offset concerns about hauntings and safety. (Although Alice did sleep with her dresser pushed infront of her door - just in case - and with her window open when a suspicious beeping made her think there may be a gas leak). The multitude of mothers and babies hanging out in the coffee shop made Britt uncomfortable - too many babies!  But at least our proximity to Zurich's Red Light District meant that there were at least a few Chinese resturants, convenience stores and wurst stands open past 10 p.m.

What we ate: Very, very, very expensive food, and not even good expensive food. Really, just food, that should have been cheap, except we were in Zurich where nothing is cheap. Our diet consisted of pasta, rice and lots of bread from the grocery store - a full-on carb diet. Given the cost of our food we took ample time to clean our plates. 

What we drank: More grocery store wine and beer (for five times the price of alcohol in Austria - sigh - for a second we considered it might be cheaper to take the train back to Austria just to buy alcohol). We also drank cranberry and aperol spritzers for a treat that rang us up a bill of 82 Swiss Francs (just like Canada, boo).

What we did: Complained a LOT. As you can probably already tell from the massive amount of complaining in this blog, Zurich was two and a half days of complaining - about the prices, the cigarette smoke, our dirty laundry, the construction, and our accomodations. Complaining about the price of food became such an obsession that instead of taking photos of Zurich we compulsively took photos of our receipts just to prove what an unbelievable sum of money we were spending. See below. In brief and fleeting moments of not complaining, we went on a guided walking tour, visited three museumes (the Swiss National Museum, the Kunsthaus Zurich, and the Moulage Museum, where JD and Alice examined wax figures of various diseases and Ashley and Britt, throughly grossed out, rested outside). En route to a botanical garden we also found ourselves in a local cemetary and children's park.  Gotta love local experiences!  We never did make it to the botanical garden.  Advice: If you are going to Zurich buy the 40 Swiss Franc pass that gets you access to the museums and unlimited transit, this will be the only deal you will get. Second piece of advice: take full advantage of the clean spring water flowing from Zurich's many fountains (and make sure to hold onto your water bottle). These may also double as showers and laundromats. Hypothesis: Zurich is home to the cleanest homeless people in Central Europe.  We also all went to a swimming area where Alice and Ashley swam in Lake Zurich and we all ate cheese and drank wine. We almost decided not to swim when we learned that it cost 7 francs just to go swimming. However, in honour of the quest to swim all the lakes we opted to swim with the wild fowl next to the casino. We also played a lot of cards in our room, which was free! And besides that, playing cards was the only source of entertainment after 10:30 p.m. We know this because we tried to go out on the town twice. One night out was marginally successfully because we took the cards and entertained ourselves in a mostly empty bar.

Lessons learned: There are ways to eat cheaply in Zurich if you get to know your local grocery store, or, if you make friends with a rich businessman. Despite our best effort (fancy clothes, recently showered), we were not successful with point number two and ended up at a cheap chinese restaurant. "Free boat tour" is considered equivalent to "boat taxi". The boats that cruise Lake Zurich are for the most part of the boat taxi type. Do not expect someone to point out tourist attractions, speak to you, or make eye contact along the way. Instead, expect them to pick smoke at the front of the boat and pick up their girlfriends.

Best learning moment: JD: "Those girls are prostitutes, I know it." Us: "No, no JD, those are just girls out for a good time." The next night... Us: "No, no those are not just girls out for a good time, they are definitely prostitutes, you are right."

Some questions for Interlaken:

1) Will Jungfraujoch be as amazing as the postcards indicate? Will they learn how to pronounce Jungfraujoch?

2) Will the bears of Bern pose for our cameras?

3) Will we continue our trend of swimming every lake and climbing every mountain?

4) Will we continue to unintentionally match eachother in clothing (unintentional, we swear).

Stay tuned!
PS.  Britt is dangerously close to running out of hair gel.

Our Motto: You stink. (The prices, the smoke, the lake, the construction, the river, the accomodations). Moving on.