After a slight delay and some collateral damage (our
plane hit a coyote - poor coyote!) we made it to Holguin and onto a bus to the
resort, where Mom and Dad were waiting to order our first round of beers – best
start ever.
Where we stayed: The beautiful Paradisus Rio de Oro. The
resort was complete with a grand outdoor lobby with a large and well-stocked
bar (minus running out of mint for mojitos for a few days), comfortable tables
to lounge at pre-dinner while trying multiple delicious cocktails (when we were
able to awkwardly flag down the best and only the best bartender), a pool table
(where Ashley, JD, and Britt could show off how terrible they are at all
sports, including non-contact), and a stage to host nightly entertainment (such
as 70s night entertainment that contained music from the 50s, 60s, and 90s)! Britt,
JD & Ash were in one building, across from Mom and Dad and Don and Sue, in
a spacious room that was quite comfortable once we figured out how to turn down
the air conditioning and stop turning JD into a popsicle. The rooms were all a
2 minute walk to a large pool with a swim up bar, and 2 minutes further to the
sparkling turquoise Atlantic Ocean.
What we ate and drank: Breakfasts consisted of freshly
prepared omelettes, toast, bacon, sausage (or hot dogs if you’re Ashley and
don’t know what sausage is supposed to look like), pastries, and when lucky,
tiny yet flavourful quail eggs. Lunch consisted of freshly grilled or fried
fish, burgers, or salads served seaside served to the soothing sound of Cuban
music and warm ocean air. Dinner was pasta or really anything of your choice at
the buffet or a special restaurant Cuban, Japanese, Italian, or fancy dinner
place. For dessert we ate delicious flambé, standing back as the master chefs
made big flames rise to show off for us. We know you probably all know this,
but Cuba is a) an island and b) a communist country subject to lots of
international trade restrictions. Thus, food would sometimes run out (or be
rationed?) – and mint, ketchup, and quail eggs were among the items that were
sometimes unavailable. We drank all the drinks – beer, wine, rum cocktails. You
name it, we drank it.
What we did: We definitely were not bored, as we had a
VERY strict daily schedule – some may call it grueling. First, we would eat
breakfast, then changed into bathing suits, followed by relaxing in the seaside
cabana, making our way over to have pre-lunch drinks, eating lunch, having a
drink by the pool, swimming/relaxing poolside, eating late afternoon pizza,
swimming some more, showering and prepping for dinner, having pre-dinner
drinks, eating dinner and having more drinks, having one more drink by the bar
and finishing it off by pretending that we would stay awake past 10 to see the entertainment, only to fall helplessly into bed… sleep… and repeat! Although we
contemplated doing various activities – archery, ping pong, learning about the
many uses of coconut – the only thing we managed to make it to was a rum
tasting and mojito-making demonstration. We did also manage to leave the resort
for half a day for a tour that went to two local schools, a medical clinic, and
a person’s house, where they learned about an attack on the Cuban coastline by
mercenaries in the late 1970s and we walked the beach at least once, taking in
its beauty and touching the rocky wall at the end denoting our success as human
beings who ‘exercised’. Ash tried to throw in a new tradition, suggesting they
all go watch the sunset from a seaside view, only to be foiled by Ms. Weather’s
decision to make it cloud over. Britt, JD, Ash and Mom spent an amazing day at
the spa, where Ash decided she wanted to move in, Britt stalked crabs, JD
coloured, and Mom enjoyed her massage – and company – thoroughly! Dad enjoyed
his special reading spot, lovingly called the Breezeway, where he could drink
coffee and lounge comfortably. Britt, JD, and Ash managed to stay up one night
to go to the beach party with Don and Sue – who turned out to be the party
animals of the bunch, making fast friends with a gang from Ontario and staying
out later than the rest of us every night! We only had one day of rain which we
spent lounging and playing an Aladdin card game, the card game of Britt and
JD’s childhood. JD and Ash made several bets – which he will tell you he won,
but they actually called it even in the end.
Lessons learned: The hawk that patrols the outdoor buffet
dining hall does not actually keep the little birds from eating off your plate
if you walk away from it and pooing on you.
Best line of the trip: “Did you just say how do you get a
hard-on?” Sue noticed HEART-lined fences, and enquired how you get a heart on
[sounding like, hard-on] the fence. To which we all stared her blankly, started
laughing, and the woman at the next table said the hilarious line.
Up next… an American adventure… from the Big Apple to the
City of Angels!
Stay tuned!
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